A New Year. A fresh start. A blank page. It seemed like the perfect time to do that thing I had been telling myself for … how long … that I needed to do — get the writing juices flowing, start working on my blog again. However, I had no idea that, other than one (now deleted) post in 2017, I had not posted since 2015. 2015. You see, 2015 was the Worst Year of my Life.
What happened in 2015? Things that felt like one assault after another. As I stare at that date it all comes flooding back. In January my daughter, then 13, went to the ER (which apparently is now called the ED so I’ll try to use that terminology) with a head-splitting migraine. In February, my son, then 18, was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. In March, my husband went to the ED (!) with a severe case of the flu. In April I lost my job. In May my mother passed away. I spent the month of June in a daze.
In July, my family received amazing news. My paternal uncle was a Korean War POW who died of malnutrition in a prison camp. No remains were ever received. However, some time in the 2000’s my aunt (his sister and closest blood relative) gave DNA to a project trying to identify a quantity of remains that had been received from South Korea. In July 2015 she received a call that they had identified remains belonging to her brother. Obviously this was great news but also very emotional and a lot to process.
In August I started a new job as full-time nanny for my then 5 month old niece. This is honestly what saved me, being around this sweet baby every day. That was when the healing started.
Fast forward to 2019. Things came full circle. My son, newly graduated from college, started his first job and moved into his first apartment, out of state. My daughter graduated from high school and started college. My niece started full-day junior kindergarten. I spent the last quarter of the last year trying to get my bearings in this new, “empty nest” life, with no large or small children depending on me on a daily basis. It felt like blogging might help me put together the picture of my new season of life.
As I look over my “old” blog, I wonder if I should just move on and start anew. However, my sense is that it will be helpful and healing for me to bridge the gap between old and new. Reflect on things that have happened, changes that have been made, lessons that have been learned, in the time between Then and Now. I think it would be helpful for me and it would be really cool if it helped somebody else out, too.